Travelling as a couple can be a wonderful experience. I know that when I headed off last year for my first solo trip I missed the other renegade like mad…who knew I was so fond of him!! When you are both on the same page being a travel couple means sharing all those amazing experiences with your best friend, never being lonely and by both bringing different but complementing perspectives so you can make the ultimate travel team!! But, sometimes travelling with your other half can be the make or break of your relationship! After being together for 13 years and visiting 29 countries together here are our observations and tips!!
A lack of honesty is toxic to any relationship, even if it is hard you have to have no secrets and let that other person know all there is to know about you. If you have a burning desire to travel the world or to a specific country and they don’t, it needs to be talked about instead of being ignored. Let each other in and you are more likely to be able to give the other person, and yourself, the life you both want.
Compromise…but not too much!
Following on from being honest is to learn how to compromise…but also where to draw the line. Once you have told each other your dreams, desires and hopes you need to find a way for you both to achieve them. Being a couple means thinking for you both and not just yourself, it can be a wonderful experience to open yourself up to things you never imagined you would do because you compromised. At the same time you have to learn not to compromise so much that you loose sight of what you want too. You have to make sure the compromise is equal otherwise resentment creeps in and someone is left unhappy.
Find someone who shares your passions
Ok, so not every couple is like this and they often say that opposite attract, but us two are like two peas in a pod, people say that we were made for each other! We often wonder how people with such different interests, hobbies and passions make a relationship work! For us we were brought together over a shared love of skateboarding and rock music. We share everything and in reality it is only the small things we ever need to compromise on. Finding someone who is on your level, your kind of weird and shares the same passions you do makes creating a life around those passions so much easier! Non of this asking permission to go climbing at weekend…we are at that crag together and no one is feeling left out!
Don’t become too insular
This is something that we try hard not to fall into and it can be the same for travelling friends too as well as if you start a new job or course alongside someone you already know! Familiarity is like a comfort blanket and even if you are the type of people who like to push yourselves outside your comfort zone this one is easily over looked. Sometimes when you travel with a partner you become insular and stop yourselves from interacting so much with the people that surround you whether that be locals or fellow travellers. Sure you want to share everything with each other but don’t become blinded by it, becoming part of a wider circle of travellers or spending time with locals is such a rewarding thing to do. It also allows you that extra space to spend time with other people than just yourselves, to widen your perspective and get other opinions too!
Discuss what you both want
With that in mind you should also again be honest with each other about what your expectations are from travelling, places you are dying to visit, activities you have always wanted to do and so on. Looking through guidebooks together and figuring out a way to make both your dream itineraries fit together is better than waiting till the day to tell them you wish you were doing something else instead! Sometimes you might find that the things you didn’t really fancy but went along with on their behalf might turn out to be amazing, and if you know you will get to do your thing the day after the chances are you will approach it much more willing and open minded!
Learn each others strengths and combine them instead of resent them!
Finally…don’t allow a relationship to stop you from making your dreams a reality – your soul mate is out there…but it is ok to be single!
Read about my first solo trip here:
Read about our wedding here:
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